water fun

water fun

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

He Loves me. He Loves me not

Lately I have been having a very hard time.  There is so much going on and so much I just wish I could tell someone.  I have no one.  I mean I have the Lord but really am very much alone in my life and in my thoughts.  My marriage is going through a rough patch and I am trying to make that all right. As well as I am being tested for Cancer.  Wow seriously the stess is so high.  I have cried so much this month and I feel I have all but brought it on myself. 

Instead of trusting in the Lord and leaning not unto my own understanding I have been doing just the opposite and have been playing the He Loves me He loves me not game.  Good things happen and I think the Lord loves me and when bad things do I think He loves me not. 

I have so many question and so many answers that need answers not just logical i can wrap my head around it but the whole i feel it deep with in me answers

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